Our psychotherapy practice specializes in guiding individuals, couples, and families in discovering a new personal narrative and sense of self. We teach clients to manage core emotional conflicts within themselves and other relationships. These internal conflicts are held in the story of the client’s family history and can leave the client with feelings of anxiety and depression and problems in relationships.
We teach our clients to identify and connect to their core beliefs and emotions. We provide access and healing to the deepest part of the self and restore and reclaim balance. The goal is always to provide hope in an emotionally safe environment.
Counseling Q & A
What is professional counseling?
Counseling is a collaborative effort between the counselor and client. Professional counselors help clients identify goals and potential solutions to problems which cause emotional turmoil; seek to improve communication and coping skills; strengthen self-esteem; and promote behavior change and optimal mental health.
How long does counseling take?
Ideally, counseling is terminated when the problem that you pursued counseling for becomes more manageable or is resolved. However, some insurance companies and managed care plans may limit the number of sessions for which they pay. Check with your health plan to find out more about any limitations in your coverage.
Video Transcript
Counseling: Definition
When you think about mental health counseling do you imagine a long couch and a silent doctor writing notes on his clipboard? This may have been true in the psychoanalysis days of the well-known Dr. Sigmund Freud, but today it actually isn’t. Counseling, often referred to as therapy, involves helping a client work through emotional and psychological issues of varying severity. It’s developed significantly through research and treatment experience by counseling psychologists and psychiatrists. Treatment methods and techniques have been developed through more recent counseling theories.
Counseling has many varied definitions through the field of psychology, but a few standards are constant. Essentially, counseling is the following:
- Performed by licensed, certified mental health counselors
- Confidential
- A profession with a range of specialties within the field
- Often done in an outpatient clinic or private practice
- Available for families, couples, and groups of people that share symptoms
- Based on scientific theories
- A personal and confidential experience
- For people with mental health problems
- For people without mental health problems
- For people with stress, anger, pain, grief, or other emotional issues
- For people who just need someone safe to talk to
- A developing science
- Sometimes supported with art, nature, or pet therapy
- Good for children, adults, the elderly, the disabled. . . everyone!
It’s also extremely important to note that counseling does not:
- Mean a client is ”crazy”
- Involve judgment on the clients actions
- Provide a quick fix
- Involve the therapist giving you answers
- Have anything to do with ”shrinking” anything!
- Need to go on forever
- Give out your personal information without your consent
Counseling Theories & Therapies
Since the time of Freud, psychologists have developed many theories about how best to approach helping others in counseling. Most of these theories are based on a combination of the views of the psychologist that created them and generally accepted psychological theories.
Some of the major counseling theories and techniques today are listed here:
- Psychoanalytic theories and psychoanalysis
- Cognitive-behavioral therapy
- Existential therapy
- Person-centered therapy
Now let’s cover these in a bit more detail.
As you saw, Sigmund Freud’s psychoanalytic theories of counseling are still used today! These theories have evolved significantly since the time of Freud but are still used in the counseling setting. Psychoanalytic therapy often focuses on childhood memories, unconscious thoughts and feelings, and exploring a client’s resistances to therapy.
On the other hand, cognitive-behavioral therapy is one of the most widely used therapies today. This theory is based on the idea that all problematic behaviors are learned, and thoughts and behaviors can be modified in counseling therapy. Therapists using cognitive-behavioral theories are goal-oriented and work with the client to modify behaviors that are causing emotional difficulty and problems for the client.
Counseling using existential therapy, though, focuses on the client’s personal experiences and personal thoughts on the meaning of life. Therapists using existential theories believe in a client’s freedom to choose their own lifestyle free from anxiety.
And, finally, we have person-centered therapy. Also called humanistic therapy, this person-centered method is easy to remember because it focuses on the uniqueness of every client. Because every client is unique, person-centered therapists may use other theories and therapies when they apply to the client’s situation. Person-centered therapy emphasizes that humans are naturally good, positive, and trustworthy. Due to this view, these therapists focus on self-exploration with their clients.
Licensed therapists are required to know these and all the other theories of counseling. Most counselors today use a combination of many types of therapy. However, due to the limitations that many insurance companies place on the amount of counseling sessions for insurance clients, cognitive-behavioral therapy is very popular. Cognitive-behavioral therapy can focus on specific, short-term behavioral goals.
Client Perspective
Let’s pretend we are a counseling client. We show up for our appointment on time and are brought into a comfortable room that often looks like a living room. The first session includes paperwork and a confidentiality agreement. Then it’s time to get to work.
Counselors often use the term ”work” as therapy is very tough when a client is dedicated to getting better. The first session will start with the therapist getting to know us and the issues that brought us to therapy. Then the work begins! We are expected to be open and honest as the relationship with the counselor becomes comfortable. The counselor will also help us think critically about our feelings and behaviors. The therapist often takes notes and we may as well. Some counseling sessions may focus on specific events, while others may try to delve deeper into why an emotion or behavior happens and how the client would like to change. These sessions run about an hour, and clients most often need to return for numerous sessions.
The length of counseling therapy varies with the client. Some clients are limited by the number of sessions an insurance company allows (usually between six and ten sessions.) Other insurance companies are more flexible, or the client can pay their own fees for therapy. In these cases, counseling may last as long as is needed and desired by the client.
The client is always free to leave therapy whenever they want, and many people test out counselors for a good-fit. For counseling to be most effective, the client needs to feel comfortable with the therapist. Since all therapists and clients are different, a switch can be made by the client or recommended by the therapist.
Counselor/Therapist Perspective
No matter what theories the counselor uses, there are some characteristics that all good counselors share. The best counselors share the following traits:
- They are able to listen deeply.
- They like helping people.
- They have emotional maturity.
- They have empathy and understanding.
- They have overall warmth.
- The express insightfulness.
- They’re comfortable with difficult issues and emotions.
- They’re non-judgmental.
As you can see, it’s very important for people who want to be counselors to be very warm, understanding, and nurturing by nature. Every person is unique, their circumstances are all different, and their needs and troubles vary. People who go into the field of counseling like helping people and have learned to be comfortable with any and all people and all issues that a client could bring to their counseling sessions.
Lesson Summary
All right, let’s take a moment to review what we’ve learned. When you’re finished watching the video, you should be able to:
- Explain what counseling is
- Discuss some major counseling theories
- Describe common counseling techniques
- Analyze how the client impacts the counseling session
As we learned, counseling, often referred to as therapy, involves helping a client work through emotional and psychological issues of varying severity, and that there are several different techniques. We learned that the main types of therapy include the following:
- Psychoanalytic therapy, which often focuses on childhood memories, unconscious thoughts and feelings and exploring a client’s resistances to therapy.
- Cognitive-behavioral therapy, which is based on the idea that all problematic behaviors are learned and thoughts and behaviors can be modified in counseling therapy.
- Existential therapy, which focuses on the client’s personal experiences and personal thoughts on the meaning of life.
- Humanistic therapy, also known as person-centered therapy, is a person-centered method and is easy to remember because it focuses on the uniqueness of every client.
No one perspective or methodology is a one-size-fits-all. But implementing the different perspectives, where and when are appropriate, is the best way to be an effective counselor.
APR.
19,
2019
I distinctly remember the biggest lesson from my first counseling course. I was learning the basic therapy concepts that can help anyone maintain their mental health. It was in that course that I slowly started to transition from the stigmatized view of mental illness to the strengths-based perspective of mental health. But what still resonates with me today is this realization I had: Everyone needs these lessons.
If we all have mental health, shouldn’t we all learn about it? In school, we spend time learning about Freud and leaders within the field of psychology, but not the practical notions to promote personal mental health. Fast forward to my present-day private practice, and now I hear this sentiment echoed by client after client: That makes perfect sense; I just wish I’d known it sooner.
Diagnosis aside, these counseling concepts could have universal benefits. Learning a few terms from Counseling 101 can empower you to reflect and make tangible changes to improve your mental health.
Here are a few to get started.
Metacognition
Metacognition is “thinking about thinking”or having awareness about your own thoughts. With this empowering concept comes the idea that if we have the power to observe our thoughts, we may also have the power to change them. Rather than believing our negative, irrational and/or unhealthy thoughts are facts, we can use mindfulness to observe them and know that our thoughts do not define us.
To work on your metacognition, you can explore the impact your thoughts have, whether or not they serve you, where they come from, and if you wish to keep them as is or work towards altering them.
Congruence
To achieve congruence, who you are on the inside should match what you convey. For example, say you value commitment and loyalty. The congruent action of choosing to marry your lifetime partner may likely bring you happiness, while the incongruent choice to cheat on your spouse may cause discontent.
To apply this, first think about your core values. Consider how your thoughts and behaviors align. Start small. For example, at the end of the day, consider how what you did that day may or may not align with your values, and subsequently consider how you felt. Think about how you can shift your actions to become more congruent.
Dissonance
Directly related to congruence, dissonance is the discomfort that arises when there is a mismatch between your thoughts, beliefs or actions. Many times, we may experience dissonance, but do not recognize that the cause is the lack of congruence. According to Leon Festinger, we strive for consistency, and the lack thereof prompts psychological stressors, such as anxiety, frustration and sadness. For example, although you may value saving for future investments, you might find yourself impulsively spending from week to week. From this mismatch, stressors may arise, without you even realizing that this may be the source of your stress.
In a situation where you notice a conflict, consider how you can reorient yourself to achieve consistency. After repeated practice, your awareness can transition from a reactive reflection to a strategy you can apply in the moment stressors arise.
Enmeshed
Enmeshment is when blurred boundaries may exist in a relationship. One can become entangled and may find it difficult to differentiate between their thoughts, feelings and values and those of another person. Many times, this develops into codependence, an excessive reliance on another person for support. This term prompts us to consider our sense of self and to what extent we may be influenced by others.
While it is not necessarily unhealthy to be inspired by another person, it can be unhealthy to be a certain way because you believe that’s the way that person would want you to be. For example, a child may choose to pursue a career because their parent has flourished in that domain. However, choosing that path because they believe it is what they should do to make their parent happy may be undermining their own sense of self. While this may vary culturally, the lack of clarity for a person’s sense of self, especially paired with frustration and resentment, can cause the development of further mental health issues.
To avoid enmeshment, take a step back and consider your sense of self. Who are you, and who influences who you are? Is there an aspect of your personality that you would like to change, but you worry it might dissatisfy someone in your life? If so, consider the relationship you may have with this person around that quality, and whether it may be unhealthy.
Projection
Projection occurs when you attribute your concerns with yourself to another individual. The recognition of the problem is highlighted in someone else rather than yourself. This typically happens as a defense mechanism to protect the ego. When you are frustrated with the qualities of another person, it may be because they relate to you in some way.
Consider two partners in a healthy relationship who have decided to move in together. After a month, Partner A notices an increase in annoyance towards Partner B because of their lack of cleanliness. What does this really mean? Is it simply about Partner A’s standards for cleanliness? Or could this simple example be representative of a bigger issue for Partner A, such as questioning their readiness to live together or the quality of the relationship?
To make use of this notion in your life, tap into your emotional intelligence when someone triggers a negative emotion in you; before considering what this means about them and how to proceed, reflect on what this truly means for you.
Schema
Jean Piaget theorized that as we learn, we categorize to make sense of things. From the Greek for shape or plan, a schema is essentially a combined system of organizing and perceiving new information in categorizations. Schemas are flexible, especially in our early years, and develop as we expand the realm of what we know.
During a young child’s first visit to a farm, they might excitedly exclaim, “Puppy!” upon seeing a horse for the first time. While the surrounding adults are likely to laugh, and correct them, “that’s a horse.” What is actually happening is an expansion of the child’s vocabulary, and subsequently their schema, which organizes categories of information and the relationships among them. We are capable of learning throughout the course of our lives, and our schemas can change and be expanded at any time.
While cognitive processes do indeed cause learning to be harder as we age, contrary to old theories, we now know we can continue to learn throughout the course of our lives. Never give up on your ability to expand your mind, question what you know, and learn something new.
Shainna Ali is a mental health practitioner, educator and advocate. She recently authored The Self-Love Workbook and is the owner of Integrated Counseling Solutions, a mental health counseling and consulting practice in Orlando, Fla. Beyond the counseling couch, Dr. Shainna enjoys contributing to NAMI to help promote mental health awareness. For more information on Dr. Shainna, please visit www.ShainnaAli.com. You can also reach her through her Facebook or Instagram page.
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