A Stress-Free Day Begins with a Good Morning
In both my personal life and my coaching practice I am a firm believer that how you start your day dictates how the rest of your day will be.
In an earlier post we talked about the importance of getting a good night’s sleep. If you’ve followed the suggestions, by now you have experienced blissful hours in dreamland. So blissful, perhaps, that maybe you decide a few extra minutes snuggling under the covers are irresistible. Then you realize that you have only 20 minutes to catch the subway and you can’t be late so you skip breakfast, tear a comb through your hair, barrel out the door forgetting your umbrella, and sprint to your stop to make it just in time. But the light rain that was falling turned into a full-on deluge, you arrive at the office not only hungry and cranky but also soaking wet. Needless to say, it’s downhill from there. Sounds like fun, right?
Just kidding.
Worst way to start the morning. Ever. I know because I have been there time after time. You’re probably nodding your head in agreement—because you’ve been there too many times, too. Let’s face it, it’s just too easy to jump mindlessly into a day consequences be damned.
After all, all of us are pressed for time. We put in long hours at work. We pack too many activities/dinners/workout classes/appointments into the week. There’s always one more website to check when we comparison shop. Some of you schedule kids’ soccer matches and dance classes into the mix. So of course we want to grab a few extra minutes of snooze time every morning. We deserve it.
Actually, we deserve much more. We deserve mornings that give us the frame of mind and the physical stamina we need to move through our complicated days with a sense of serenity and purpose. Like Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings used to sing, “be easy, baby,” we should go gentle in to the morning.
Clients and friends often complain to me that “I am just too busy to take time in the morning to set my day up to be calm.” In response I say, “so what you are telling me is that you do have time or energy to have a totally awful, stressful, no-good, very bad day?” My question gives them something to think about.
They—and you—can have a totally kickass day by establishing a morning routine designed to take the stress and strain out of those early hours. A new routine will take some getting used to, but believe me, it’s well worth the effort.
Let’s talk about some easy ways you can start to shift and make more mindful choices to set your day up for success:
- Set your alarm for half hour earlier than your usual time. Wake up to meditative music or another gentle sound. Use the extra thirty minutes to ease into the new day.
- Put a soft light on a timer to turn on when your alarm goes off. This is especially important as the days grow shorter and many of us find ourselves waking up in the dark. Start your day with (faux) sunshine!
- Do light stretches and deep breathing in bed before you get up.
- Say five things you are grateful for right then, at that very moment, before your feet hit the ground.
Here are five more suggestions for beginning your day without stress and keeping it stress-free:
- Skip the electronics. Don’t look at email, texts, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram or Pinterest until you have had time to really BE with yourself. Promise yourself twenty minutes in the morning to check in with yourself, not the world by leaving the electronics off.
- I start my day every day with a 20-minute Vedic meditation—right after I’ve rolled out of bed, brushed my teeth, and washed my face. If you take only one suggestion to change your morning, it should be this one. Learning how to meditate is one of the best investments you can make in yourself; the benefits are astounding and include a sense of inner peace, but also an enhanced ability to concentrate, a greater capacity for creativity, and an all-round feeling of well-being. To learn more about the benefits of meditation, the different forms (I highly recommend Vedic or Transcendental Meditation), and for a quick guide to get you started, read what the Mayo Clinic has to say.
- Mix a generous squirt of fresh lemon juice into a glass of warm water and drink up. Not only does the water and lemon juice concoction deliver hydration and a healthy dose of Vitamin C, it also aids digestion and, because it’s full of pectin, keeps hunger pangs at bay.
- Set a daily intention for yourself. Write it down—or say it aloud while looking squarely in the mirror. Make a commitment to yourself to make one healthy change—have that green juice, green smoothie or salad; take a long walk; cut back on your caffeine intake. You might even decide to try meditating (nudge, nudge). Hold yourself accountable to sticking to your one healthy change.
- Begin your morning the night before. Have your outfit for the day on the hanger and ready to grab. Make sure the lemon is on the counter, ready to slice. Prep your lunch and healthy snacks, like carrot or pepper sticks or apple slices, so that you can just grab and go.
Life is precious. Our bodies are our temples. Make sure you have the best day possible by giving yourself and your body the respect they deserve. You deserve to have the best morning ever. Just “be easy, baby!”—and set your groove for the rest day. Namaste. 🙂
No one likes having a stressful (or haphazard) morning routine for school that ends up making you (and your kids) late. It knocks you off your game, messes with your mood…and usually results in you leaving something essential on the kitchen counter.
These morning routine tips and hacks will help you and yours wake up on time, get ready faster, and head to school with minutes to spare—and they don’t involve setting the alarm any earlier than you have to.
Note: Big kids (middle school, high school, and college students) can handle this morning routine on their own. For younger kids, go through the routine with them step by step. Once they’re old enough, they’ll transition into doing it by themselves, giving you precious spare minutes back at night and in the morning.
Your Morning Routine for School: Part One
The night before…
- Check the weather forecast. Knowing the weather for tomorrow will help you pack your bag and plan your outfit.
- Pack your bag. Make sure your books, papers, laptop, headphones, keys, and anything else you need (sunglasses or umbrella?) for tomorrow are packed up and waiting by the front door. The more you do when you’re wide awake, the less you’ll forget tomorrow morning.
- Charge your devices. Laptop, tablet, phone—make sure they’re powered up.
- Pick an outfit. With the forecast in mind, you know whether to dress for sun, rain, snow, hot temperatures, or cold. Build from there, from shoes on up. (Now is the time to realize you don’t have any clean socks and adjust accordingly). Put everything on a hook on your bedroom door or over a chair.
- Move your alarm across the room. It’s way too easy to hit snooze from the comfort of your cozy bed. Instead, set an old-school digital clock or your phone to at least 30 minutes before you need to leave the house, then put it at least 4 feet from your mattress. When it goes off in the morning, you’ll be forced to get out of bed to turn it off. You’re just a tiny stumble to the bathroom away from washing up and starting your routine.
Your Morning Routine for School: Part Two
The morning of…
- Once you’ve turned off your alarm, hit the bathroom. Feeling groggy? Wash your face or shower using a minty-smelling body wash for extra perk-up power.
- Make your bed. It takes seconds and should be a regular part of your morning routine—you’ll thank yourself tonight when you flop into your well-made bed, exhausted.
- Get dressed. This should take seconds since you prepared last night. (Don’t switch outfits on impulse—save that good idea for tomorrow.)
- Eat breakfast. After being in sleep mode for at least eight hours (Remember: teenagers need eight to 10 hours a night; younger kids need even more), you need to refuel. Choose a protein-and-carb combo to keep you energized and full until lunch. Think: cereal and milk or toast and nut butter; an egg, yogurt or overnight chia pudding, and fruit. Even a cheese sandwich on whole-grain bread will do the trick—and you can take it to go.
- Brush your teeth (again). Dentists have finally provided us with an answer to the age-old question: Should you brush your teeth before or after breakfast? (Hint: The answer is before!) But it doesn’t hurt to brush again after you eat.
- Fix your hair. Whether you just brush your hair in the morning or attempt cute, easy hairstyles, take just a moment to get your locks how you like them.
- Save a few minutes for quick chores. Walk the dog, feed the cat, and take kids to the bus stop. Rather than check your phone or turn on the TV, do these things now while you still have time.
- Head out. Grab your bag as you leave the house, lock up if you have to, and get going! The late bell will never strike fear into your heart again.
Morning routines can be a struggle even for those who are naturally “morning people.” If you’re facing a busy schedule and/or managing a family, the impetus to get up and get going stat can be extreme — but for an optimal day of productivity and positivity, it’s best that we take some time to ground ourselves and start the day on a good note.
How much time? While it does depend on how early you rise and what sort of relaxation methods you prefer, we’ve determined, through conversing with mental health experts and life coaches, that a half-hour should do the trick.
We’ve broken this 30-minute routine into two, five- and 10-minute intervals. Here’s what to do, starting with the moment you open your eyes to get your day on the best possible track. You can do this all before a workout, shower and breakfast, or build these activities around those essentials.
First 2 minutes
5 minutes: Mindfulness techniques and deep breathing
Next, implement some mindfulness techniques to clear your mind. This can be in the form of meditation, prayer or affirmations of gratitude.
“I recommend that all my patients engage in some sort of meditation or prayer first thing in the morning,” says Dr. Nicole Bernard Washington, a board certified psychiatrist and the chief medical officer at Elocin Psychiatric Services. “The benefit is to clear your thoughts and allow you to start the day with a clear mind.”
“Gratitude affirmations are a great way to start the day as well,” Washington says. “By starting the day making gratitude statements you allow yourself to focus on the positive things in your life. In a world that tends to highlight the negative, starting your day off on a positive note can have positive effects on your mood.”
You can also incorporate breathing exercises to help achieve clarity.
“While laying in bed, breath in through your nose, hold it for five seconds and then release the air through your mouth,” instructs Dr. Erlanger ‘Earl’ Turner, a licensed clinical psychologist and assistant professor of psychology at the University of Houston-Downtown. “Repeat these steps several times. It should help to relax the mind and body.”
5 minutes: Journaling, which can also be done in bed
The urge to pick up your phone or laptop is probably powerful now, but hold off for just another five minutes and instead take to pen and paper (ideally you should keep a journal on your nightstand).
Christie Tcharkhoutian, M.A., MFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist finds “writing upon waking” to be beneficial.
“Some brain research suggests that this practice is helpful for brain integration because it helps to integrate parts of the brain that involve linguistic and creative capabilities, setting a tone of creativity and balance for the rest of the day,” she says. “Writing something positive — such as three things you are grateful for or a positive intention for the day — can help to improve mood throughout the day. Our dream life and subconscious work overtime in our sleep and channeling that stream of consciousness as soon as you wake up into writing helps to feel more connected and mindful throughout your day. Writing continues that creative flow from your dream life into your day as opposed to automatically waking up and looking at your phone, reading and consuming information which can put a creative block and interfere with your ability to stay present throughout the day.”
If journaling isn’t your thing, listen to positive messages you recorded
Journaling may be a practice you’re not into, or prefer to do at night. If either is the case, consider making a recording of yourself reading daily affirmations aloud and listen to them instead.
“To implement daily affirmations into your morning and set an intention by reading them aloud to yourself, or listening to a recording of yourself reading them every morning,” says Tcharkhoutian. “If positive statements about your identity are replaying like a broken record, they will combat the negative beliefs that can creep in and sabotage your day.”
5 minutes: Write down essential tasks for the day
Once you do the aforementioned practices, you can get down to the business of the day — but before your mind starts buzzing with to-dos, use these five minutes to itemize, prioritize and be super specific with what you want to achieve today in list form.
“Don’t just [write] ‘check emails.’ Write down, ‘check 20 emails in 30 minutes from x to x time,” says Stephanie Lincoln, a licensed mental health counselor, certified fitness trainer and the Founder/CEO of Fire Team Whiskey. “We all have hundreds of items on our to-do lists, and this helps us prioritize just five essentials for that day to not feel so overwhelmed.”
“Make sure your essential tasks are focused on your current priorities,” adds Lincoln. “We all suffer from ‘shiny object syndrome’; the thing that is the loudest and most flashy is the thing we will focus our attention on, but step back and ask yourself, ‘Is this really a priority, or is it just the most appealing one I want to work on because its shiny?’ Identify the one task you are dreading the most and make that #1 on your list. Get that done first because most likely, the most dreaded task is usually the most important one.”
Check off each item as you go through the day so that later you, you can relish the accomplishments.
10 minutes: Time with family (including pets)
You’ve now devoted 17 minutes to grounding yourself, meaning you have 12 minutes left. Now is the time to enjoy quality time with family.
“Set aside ten minutes for family,” advises Forrest Talley, Ph.D, a clinical psychologist. “Parents with young children will find this challenging in that they are busy getting them into their school clothes, organizing school lunch bags, etc. But for those with teens, or empty nesters, this can be a great time to connect before the business and stress of the day take on a momentum of their own.”
If you have pets, make them a part of this time.
“The bond between [pet] owners and their pets is often very strong, and a source of significant happiness,” says Talley. “Including a little quality time in the morning insures this bond is not neglected.”
What to do with those two extra minutes? You shouldn’t have a problem using them now that you can get your phone back.
The article “A 30-Minute Routine That Will Clear Your Mind and Banish Stress” originally published on NBC News’ BETTER.
